Holding on... do you listen?

As I am learning to listen to my own heart, soul and spirit I wonder how long I have been avoiding doing so.  I often listen with intent but is it with the right intent?  Am I looking to argue with my own heart, challenge my own soul, and let my ego control my very spirit?

This morning I awoke about 20 minutes before the alarm was to go off.  I could see the clock and it read "6:12 am" and I was happy to know I had a few more minutes before I needed to get up.  I had been in bed since ten last night so it was not that I was lacking sleep nor was it because I wanted to snooze longer I was happy because it gave  me time to reflect in the darkness.

I could hear the clock my brother made me ticking in the darkness.

Tick, tick, tick, tick.... with each passing tick I knew the end was near.  The end of my slumber and a need to face the day was almost upon me.  I waited.  I opened my eyes into the darkness and could see just a little light around the pulled drapes.  The pre-dawn glow in the distance of the upcoming day.  The sun would rise again as it always does.  Today is no different.  I may be different but the day would dawn like it has for millions of years.  Solstice is past and the light of the days will get longer each day as we evolve into spring.

I anticipated the alarm and listened and watched.  The LED of the clock moved on from 6:12 to 6:20 to 6:28.  Then it was time.

Time to rise and shine with the sun.  Time to get out of bed and no longer anticipate the end of the night but to celebrate the beginning of the day.  Time to move on with the evolution of my life and to let the universe shine through my existence.  Time to get up, get going and start another day.

Do you weigh yourself down in the endings in your life?  Do you steep yourself in the fear of the unknown and the uncertainty of beginnings and the newness of each day that you dread the coming of the clock to read 6:30 knowing the alarm will break the silence bring in the world and open up your vulnerability.

I am in transition all the time.  I am changing and ebbing and flowing with the tide of the universe.  I can fight against it or I can flow with it and float on my own choices.  I am the universe manifesting through a human nervous system and becoming self-aware (Deepak Chopra) I am "unbounded and free" to be all that I can be.  The key is dealing with my endings, losses, grief and overcoming any fear of the unknown.

The clock with strike 6:30 AM whether I want it to or not ... I can welcome the day kicking and screaming or I can welcome the day embracing the potential and possibility it offers.  I can welcome the growing light in my life or I can live in the darkness of my endings.

I choose life!  Do you?

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